Flip out

I stumbled across this site the other day when I was mooching around the web.

It talks about how dangerous bears are and what to do if you meet one. Now, I'm a bear and I can tell you that none of the tips on this site are much use.

Basically, if you meet a bear, try saying hello. If it's a fella, ask him what football team he supports or what sort of music he likes. That should break the ice.

If it's a female, tell her that you like her coat and ask if she's done something different with her hair. You know the sort of thing.

If all else fails you can always try giving them some food. That certainly works with me. However, be warned - bears hate scotch eggs. If anything is certain to make a bear flip out and lose it, it's a scotch egg!