The only polar bear in town.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

I'll remember your face

It's not easy being a traffic warden, you know. You should hear some of the abuse I get every day when drivers get back to their cars to find that I've just slapped them with a ticket. I don't enjoy being a traffic warden, I fuckin hate it. I only do it because the ladies seem to love the uniform.

Sometimes if the drivers are really apologetic and polite I take pity on them and let them off with the ticket, but if they are complete pricks I really have to bite my lip and hold back from riping their heads off their shoulders with my huge claws.

I've read the Traffic Warden's Code of Conduct from cover to cover and at no point does it say that I can kill a driver for giving me shit, nor can I beat the living crap out of them with my clipboard. Which is a crying shame.

So, next time any of you give me any stick and I just stare at you, be aware that I'm making a mental note of your face and thinking: "If you and me were in the wild now, as god is my witness, I would eat you."

You'll keep, fuckers!

On a lighter note, this site takes the piss out of the Glazier takeover of Manchester Utd, which is always funny in my book.